A-frame fold, knees bent –  not entirely on the floor so that I’m squatting in the most perfect way that makes running while my feet are grounded, butt in air, and hands are on ground with a Clorox wipe vigorously scrubbing the floor. This would be the second time over that I’ve done this maneuver in an effort to clear the trail of human feces that came from one of my children, which began in our dining room, under the table, on the furthest side away from the nearest bathroom.

This was the scene just this evening, the eve of “Mother’s Day.”

I often laugh to myself at the most random times thinking about the baby showers you go to and the fun little games or notes that ask for ‘advice’ on being a mother. There are so many trite phrases, catch phrases, common phrases, hokey phrases, and even cliché that are offered in times like this. They all are perfect. They are all meaningful. They are all misunderstood until you experience motherhood.

I didn’t even gag as I scooped the poop along the trail, cleaned the brown runny mess down my son’s leg, quickly changed his dirty clothes out for clean undies, and pristinely scrubbed his shorts, him, and myself among the unpleasant stench that filled the narrow bathroom in which this scene unfolded.

That is motherhood.

Don’t get me wrong, I have definitely gagged during some mommy moments, but more frequently than not, the mommy-super-gene kicks in and takes over to make the unimaginable conquerable.

From burping up the milk my sweet infant just drank all over me to projectile vomiting it in a manner that only seems like something made for the movies, it’s all manageable as a mother.

The sleepless nights.

The constant change in schedules.

The energy to keep up.

The change in food preference.

The monitoring of sugar intake.

The teaching manners.

The reading of the same book for 13 days in a row.

The stress of boo-boos.

The redirecting when, well always ….

The temper tantrums.

The judgement of others just by the look in their eyes when you handle said temper tantrums.

The battle over getting dressed and out the door on time.

The worry over whether you introduced too mature of cartoons too soon.

The guilt of being away while at work.

The shame of wishing you were away when you are with them.

The exhaustion of a busy day.

 

This list is not all that motherhood is. This list is only one side of a coin. Motherhood is a juxtaposition. For all the things that seem just awful, horrible, and unimaginable, there is an opposite list that goes on infinitely.

 

The sweet night time cuddles.

The warmth of morning snuggles.

The evolution of one’s self to becoming more adaptable and flexible.

The precious time spent well.

The experience of new tastes on a child’s face – the first try at peas, a lemon, sour candy, ice-cream, or cake.

The consciousness of learning how important health is when you have someone to live for.

The memorization of books leading to a love a language to express their emotions, desires, and opinions.

The kissing, cuddles, and gentleness in caring for bruises, cuts, and scratches.

The lessons in distraction and creativity making you feel like a mastermind of human psychology.

The patience you can experience when you free yourself of control.

The grace and empathy you can provide to others because of your experience.

The joy of seeing your child gain independence in the selection of their clothes that will one day lead to greater choices.

The funny moments when your kid quotes a movie line at an appropriate moment but at the wrong time.

The ability to provide a secure and stable life.

The pleasure you feel when you get to experience all the little moments that add up to the big ones.

The satisfaction in being present, vulnerable, and simply there for your children.

That is motherhood.

I would not trade being a mom for anything. With each day that I experience motherhood, I appreciate my mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, and mother-in-law more. My journey is just beginning as my boys are five and four. I know that the juxtaposition of motherhood will continue. I also know that the horrible moments don’t compare to that of the wonderful ones.

And thus, is my sage advice for an expecting mother, embrace the mess of it and savor the sweet blessings it brings. There are no words that can prepare or reveal all that motherhood is and has to offer.